How Mindless Jargon Drives Away Visitors

I am so tired of the mindless jargon that is being dumped across the Web. It seems like we all need Little Orphan Annie decoder rings just to decrypt a simple article. I don't know if this is coming from a “Snowflake” identity crisis or an “Emperor Has No Clothes” identity crisis, but either way, it's irritating me. In my freelance research work I regularly have to scan business articles and even some pop culture articles that are full of nonsense words. As an example of what I'm talking about, I have taken the following statement from a website that generates mindless business jargon just for fun:

“Strategic Planning is a process by which we can maximize the future and develop the necessary areas of strategic focus and initiative to implement and craft the mission.”

Holy Cow! What does that really mean?? Basically, “get all your ducks in a row” (old-timer jargon) or how about: We will develop a plan that will focus on all aspects of the  mission and protect against unwanted surprises. Ok, that's still a little wordy but much more like a polite bite, rather than a disgusting mouthful.

If you are a freelance writer or are generating your own content, please, try to stay away from the mindless jargon. Trust me, less IS more and your readers will thank you for it; including those readers who are forced to craft mindless jargon to share in boardrooms for their 9 to 5 gig.

My pain doesn't just stop with the mindless business jargon. While I'm at it, let me share something from pop culture that is like fingernails on a chalkboard to me: usage of the word literally. As in, “My head literally exploded.” Ok, the person saying this technically wouldn't be able to since the sentence is past tense and if the person's head really did explode, then how could they be speaking to me? Aargh!!

Mindless Jargon and Schizophrenic Worker Bees...

From my perspective, we are living in a world where people either don't know what they want to say or they don't know how to say it. People have forgotten how to express themselves authentically. It is sad really. We have a lot of that authenticity drummed out of us in our school years and the business world just teaches us how to blend in while pressuring us to stand out.

The confusion and fear usually only serve to  create schizophrenic worker bees with vocabularies full of mindless jargon. Yes, having a big vocabulary is important; however, don't make word'll just end up sounding like like Oswald Bates from In Living Color. Please, don't stuff your vocabulary with a bunch of ridiculous $4 words when a short, snappy reply stocked with 10 cent words will work. Help me make the world a little more clear.

If you saw Arrival, which was an awesome movie by the way, you watched Amy Adam's character try to communicate with aliens who used a totally different method of language than humans. The movie showed how easy it is to blow up a planet with a simple syntax error. We need to do a better job of communicating with each other using our authentic voices. Think about it...

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